This
month has been one filled with so much laughter and happy moments, but it was
also filled with devastation and sadness. We live in an ever-changing world where
human interaction is possible with the click of buttons. We click “like”-buttons
on Facebook, “love”-buttons on Instagram and we take photos of ourselves to
send into the world via Snapchat (to name only a few). But how genuine is that “like”?
How much do you really know about your thousand plus friends on Facebook other
than what they selectively choose to portray on social media?
I
was off the social media grid for 30 days and I still can’t even comprehend how
needed and vital this decision was for my mental health.
Round
about November 14th, I sat in a very boring Postgraduate class and
as per usual my friend and I started a conversation about people and things
that irritates us. After naming a few things that bothered us in turn, I
commented on people’s misuse of Facebook. My friend (said friend does not have
Facebook) looked me dead in the eyes and told me that it only takes one button
to deactivate an account. It got me thinking about the reasons why I have a
Facebook account. Since 2007, a day hasn’t gone by that I did not check what
happened on Facebook. With connectivity and smartphones booming, it got easier
to check what is happening in the world with the click of a button in the palm
of your hand. Social media applications are a way of life nowadays.
I
don’t know if I am the only person, but it came to the point where scrolling aimlessly
on Facebook and Instagram, consumed so much of my precious time in a day
without me realizing it. When I went to bed, I checked Facebook and Instagram
and when I woke up in the mornings, I did the same. It consumed me without me
knowing that it has a hold on me.
After
writing my last exam on November 20th, I got in my car and took a
lone mission to Upington where I had a lot of thinking time. I decided there and
then that a social media fast is necessary. I did all my preparation for this
challenge. I uninstalled Facebook and Instagram from my phone and tablet so
that the temptation to check my notifications is less. My social media detox
was hard, but so rewarding.
Here
is what I’ve learned during this month:
1. The people who really care about you will
always be there. Regardless of where you are or what happens to you.
I
am speaking about the people who will celebrate every triumph with you and who
will dry your tears when it seems as if your world is crashing down.
2. Make time for friends who you value in your
life.
Friendship
is a two-way street, but it starts with your own loyalty towards someone else
and your willingness to be interested in their well being behind screens.
Message or phone that one or two friends you haven’t heard of in a while and do
not assume that hitting the “like”-button is enough. They might just need that
extra little love more than you can imagine.
3. Stop comparing yourself to others.
“Comparison
is the thief of joy.” - Theodore Roosevelt
How
many times do you see photos of other people’s joy and laughter and that
devilish voice in your head makes the comparison? Your chapter 5 cannot
possibly be compared to someone else’s chapter 32. Stop comparing. It is
killing your own beauty and self-worth. You. Are. Enough. Let me repeat that so
it goes through. You. Are. Enough.
4. Do not do something or go somewhere just to
post it on social media.
“Take
a lot of pictures so that I can choose the best one to post!” I am especially
guilty of this one. Who doesn’t want to look good? I’ve learned during this
month that the photos I took of all the places where I went and of myself, was
for myself. I was immersed in the beauty of a place rather than how it looked
on a screen.
5. Human interaction is important. Speak to the
person next to you.
In
so many places where I’ve been, I saw couples or friends in restaurants and
public spaces like airports sitting next to each other, both on their phones or
tablets, looking down, without saying a word to each other. This killed me
inside. If you cannot separate your palm from your phone, maybe try to make a
deliberate effort to never take out your phone when sitting at a table. Make your
own rules and stick to it.
I
am far from perfect, but this month taught me so much more than I could ever
bargain for. I am learning again to see the world through my own eyes in
comparison to what the world wants you to see through screens and filters. I am
not saying that everybody should remove themselves from the social media realm
(don’t get me wrong), but I hope that people will start thinking twice before
posting something or sharing things that might be hurtful to one another.
May
we realize how much we need interaction outside of social media and how much we
can give to others that need that kind or thoughtful message or hug.
